“It sounds like you didn’t get to live in your own house.”
That’s what the $110 per hour therapist told me on my second visit, over 20 years ago, in Chattanooga, Tennessee.
We were discussing a dream I had had after my first therapy visit. I won’t describe it in detail here, but basically it involved a double bed in a drainage ditch that sat where our front yard met the street when I was a boy in Chattanooga (that was the bedroom for my brother and I in the dream). A large pet dog slept beside the bed. The house was up the hill a bit from the bed. And one night the woman in the house was raped, then cut with a knife on her throat where her voice box was, so she could not speak of the terror she had experienced. We had a “shoot-out” with the intruder outside the house, but he escaped.
I could not make heads or tails of the dream until the therapist said the line about “not living in” my “own house.” Then it all came together in my mind.
I loved my parents. They were good people. I miss them now, and think of them each and every day.
But something happened back there that set a course for my life. And it was not good. Some abuse. Some muzzling of emotion. Some terror. It happened on “their watch” (so to speak).
And I am left with a choice. As are you, perhaps.
- Do Yourself a Favor . . . Forgive: Learn How to Take Control of Your Live Through Forgiveness, by Joyce Meyer http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/do-yourself-a-favorforgive-joyce-meyer/1106244254?ean=9780446547277
- Getting Rid of the Gorilla: Confessions on the Struggle to Forgive, by Brian Jones http://www.amazon.com/Getting-Rid-Gorilla-Confessions-Struggle/dp/1458752313